Random Thoughts

I feel like I’m expanding. And I feel my role in my generation. Excuse me I’m a little in the clouds 💨. Feels like I’m in a Time Machine as I see 4 generations of my family, like a speaker with a super sonic boom increasing in volume with the circles getting bigger and each on of us standing in them. Like an echo of generations. A generation of Echoes.

Journal Entry #5

I liked this girl. I genuinely used to like this girl. Which is new to me because generally, I don’t like people. A lot have strange traits I don’t agree with but hey, pop off and be yourself. But when they start fixing their mouth to talk about me and mine that’s where I draw the line. Who made you judge and jury? The only person that can judge us is God. Yes, be entitled to your opinion but don’t let me hear it. Don’t let that news get back to me, because now I’m finna fire that ass up.

My family was just ridiculed for being a bad influence because some smoke weed and drink. As is their adult right. They’re not harming anyone and in this day in age more people smoke weed and drink than those who don’t. Saying we have questionable morals, according to who? And what about our morals are questionable? The fact that we’re always there for our family? That we love unconditionally? I’m so tired of people letting ignorance speak for them. Why don’t y’all ever have anything positive to say about us? Why don’t we talk about the fact that none of us are in jail? Talk about how all of us went to college. Talk about how all of us have and can keep a job. Talk about how my brother is always there for her. We never once came for this girl’s family.

This girl is in the courtroom of her bedroom passing judgment, hasn’t been to work in God knows how long. You can’t even support yourself, how are you gonna support a baby? With the help of your brothers who have responsibilities and lives of their own? Sure they’ll help out when they can but it won’t last forever and it will never compare to the help my family can give.

Now I could say some things about your family. Your parents especially, but I won’t. How about they get off of that high horse and stop acting like they’re squeaky clean? They should worry about the problems they have and get out of everyone else’s business.

Know this, if y’all in any way try to withhold a part of our family away from us, y’all will fight on your hands. We will not just sit idly by and let you strip her away with your bogus claims of us. Don’t make us an enemy when we’re trying our hardest to be y’all’s friends.

There’s a baby involved, stop letting everyone have your ear. Think about the long-term effects this will have on her. Don’t sell false narratives about the other half of her family. We love her just as much as you. So what you don’t agree with some of our ways, we don’t agree with some of y’all’s but we keep our mouths closed. Maybe y’all should start doing the same ☺️. Stay Blessed 💕

(Strictly an emotional piece and from one POV)

My Curiosity Surrounding the Gabby Petito Case

Has anyone else noticed the strange details in the Gabby Petito case that was covered in the recent Netflix documentary? The case of the couple who were vlogging their road-trip across the United States brings up so many questions.

The Police Interaction

First off, I’m not here to blame the police, but there are definitely some things that don’t sit right with me. The fact that they believed Gabby was the aggressor, despite her being in tears and visibly anxious, while Brian sat there laughing and calm, is wild to me. When they were pulled over, Brian’s behavior was off — he answered questions awkwardly but eagerly and seemed suspicious. Gabby had a bruised cheek and scratches on her, but I guess that wasn’t enough evidence to see that he was the aggressor. Even though the person who called 911 saw him slapping her? Police work at its finest.

Domestic Violence and Police Actions

The part that confused me was the police paying for a hotel room for Brian. After separating them, they took this man to a domestic violence hotel. Huh? As if he was in danger by his 90-pound, fragile girlfriend. And since when do cops pay for domestic violence hotels? I didn’t even know that was a thing until I watched the documentary.

The Racial Disparity

There’s also the racial component that can’t be ignored. I’m willing to bet no Black person has ever had the luxury of being offered a paid hotel room by police after a domestic dispute.

The treatment Gabby received, and the way the situation was handled, are glaringly different from how things typically play out when race is involved. The media coverage alone was incredible. Everybody in the United States was looking for Gabby. But where’s the media coverage when a black woman goes missing? Yeah, Netflix talked about it briefly but they didn’t even scratch the surface. Not taking anything away from Gabby may she rest in peace.

The Delay in Reporting Gabby’s Disappearance

Now, I’m not here to judge Gabby’s mother, but I personally think if I were in her shoes, I wouldn’t have waited 10 days to file a missing persons report. My parents would’ve sent out a search party the moment they realized something was wrong, even if they believed I didn’t have signal. But white families seem to have different levels of worry when it comes to things like this.

The Laundrie Family’s Involvement

As the case unfolded, Brian’s family acted strangely. They refused to cooperate with Gabby’s parents and wouldn’t even answer texts about her whereabouts. So, when Gabby’s parents finally sent the cops to check Brian’s home, they found Brian had returned home with Gabby’s van — with no sign of her. When asked if they had seen the girl they told the officer to speak with their lawyer, which is suspicious in itself.

Then, a few weeks passed, and Gabby’s body was found. The documentary even portrayed her body as being “staged,” which raises even more doubts.

Shortly after, Brian disappears. His family claims he’s missing after going on a hiking trip, but why did they need to take a secluded hiking trip to discuss things? To me, it seems like they were trying to figure out a way to help him escape.

The Suicide and Staged Evidence

It’s even more disturbing that, after Brian’s death, a letter surfaced in which his mother stated that she would help him get rid of a dead body if needed and to burn the letter after he read it. I get family loyalty, but to be this unsympathetic to the parents of someone who just lost their daughter is incredibly cold.

Once Brian went missing, it was oddly convenient that his body was found so quickly. His parents managed to locate him after only an hour of searching — far quicker than the authorities had found Gabby. Brian’s body was fully decomposed, even though Gabby’s body remained intact. How does that make sense? And the fact that his personal belongings were perfectly surrounding the body? That’s too convenient to be real. The way his death was portrayed — especially the suicide note that shifted blame to Gabby and wished for animals to tear his flesh down to the bone — just felt way too exact. It all seems staged to me.

Conclusion: Brian’s Possible Survival

Based on all of this, I have to wonder: Is Brian still alive? All of these strange circumstances surrounding the case make me think that maybe he’s been hiding this whole time, and everything surrounding his “death” is part of an elaborate cover-up.

“Not for Everyone, and That’s Fine”

Why did this man text me snapping? He clearly has issues, and I’m so glad I never went on a date with him. He called me a hoe, and when I fired back, he hit me with the usual—telling me I’m alone, that my box must be trash, that I need to focus on the fact that I’m single at 25, how it’s going to bring him joy that I have a period every month. Not knowing that I happen to really enjoy my period; makes me feel like a woman. And honestly, that just proves my point: a lot of men of this generation have lost their minds. I don’t tolerate disrespect. But I’m still mad at myself for even giving him my energy.

Marriage and having a man? Of course, I’d love that one day, but I’m in no rush. I don’t want to wake up 30 years from now regretting a decision I made just because I felt pressured. I want to know what I can tolerate, what I can live with. I don’t want to settle and end up resenting my own choices. Right now, my focus is on me and my career.

I don’t fit in with a lot of people, and maybe that’s because I’m very honest. Or maybe it’s the way I carry myself—with confidence love and self respect. But some people perceive that as I think I’m better than everyone. People just assume things about me before even getting to know me. They will never know the trials and tribulations I went through to even become the woman I am today.

When you’re leveling up, there’s always something trying to hold you back. I have to let go of anything pulling me down. That includes men like him. The men who hate women and only want to use women for their bodies.

I don’t care about the things other people obsess over. Sex is whatever at this point—it’s all men seem to think about, and I’m just over it. The second I call them out for treating me like an object, suddenly I’m a hoe, I play games, I’m not even pretty. Same tired story.

And then there’s the women who don’t like me for no reason. But I knew this was coming. I was getting along with too many people, and I wondered when the shoe would drop. I’ve never been a social butterfly. I keep to myself for a reason.

I know the truth about myself, and that’s all that matters. I’m self-aware. I trust my own eyes. I trust my own instincts. People may not see the error in their ways, but I do. And no one likes being corrected.